The Blackmail Marriage Page 16

  Carrie paused and took a deep breath, looking up at the blue summer sky.

  It was almost six weeks since the appalling incident outside the castle in which Luc had been shot, taking the bullet which had been meant for her.

  ‘Ready?’

  She looked up as she felt Jay’s light but protective touch on her arm and fiercely tried to banish the shadows from her eyes. Banishing them was at least something she could attempt to do—unlike those darker shadows that surrounded her spirit and her innermost self.

  The black car with its heavily tinted windows was already drawing up alongside the private entrance to the castle.

  Following the shooting she had had to delay her plans to leave S’Antander. For one thing, she had been told that medically she was in too much shock, and then later her position as the Prince’s wife had made it impossible for her to do so. Soon, though, the duty she had had to assume would be at an end and she would be free to leave.

  Only she knew how much she was dreading the ordeal that now lay ahead of her, and she prayed it would be her final one.

  A grim-faced uniformed chauffeur got out of the car.

  Carrie’s mouth had gone dry, and her heart was pumping enough adrenalin around her veins to fuel a moon-bound missile. She couldn’t bring herself to look at the waiting black car. Thankfully Jay had stepped past her and was walking towards it.

  The chauffeur was opening the door.

  Carrie ached to look away but she couldn’t bear to. Holding her breath, she watched as the tall familiar figure uncoiled itself from the passenger seat and stepped out, lifting his face towards the sun and taking a deep breath before walking calmly towards her.

  Carrie felt as though the rapid thud of her heart was going to choke her. Even though she knew they were not open to public view in the square, her mind kept on running over what had happened there. She wanted to rush to Luc and drag him inside to safety, to beg him to hurry, and all the time her gaze was frantically searching the protected empty space surrounding the car and the castle entrance, which she knew was heavily guarded, just in case there was any danger there.

  The last six weeks had taken a terrible toll on her. Guilt, pain and fear—she had known them all.

  When she had followed Luc to the hospital after the shooting she had been told that he had been very lucky and simply suffered a gunshot wound to his shoulder. But later complications had developed; the wound had become infected and Luc had gone into a coma as the poison spread through his system.

  For almost a week everyone had feared that he would die.

  Carrie had sat with him night and day through the long hours of his fight for life, willing him to recover, reminding him over and over again of how much his country, his people needed him.

  She would, she knew, never know if any of her words had reached him, just as she would never know if he had heard her final exhausted admission that she loved him.

  At first she had refused to allow herself to believe it when she had been told that he was starting to recover, but then he had regained consciousness, and after that Carrie had refused to visit the hospital, afraid that her presence would reveal too much of her emotional turmoil.

  ‘He has everything and everyone he needs,’ she had told Jay stubbornly. ‘Our marriage is over, and as soon as I am able to do so I intend to leave.’

  But she had not been able to allow herself to do so until she knew that Luc was well enough to leave hospital.

  ‘Have they made the arrangements I requested?’ she heard Luc questioning Jay as they reached her.

  ‘Everything’s organised,’ Jay confirmed. ‘There’s no way, though, that you can give your speech from the square, Luc. Even the open balcony is out of the question. Instead, a loudspeaker system has been rigged up, and I’ve had new bulletproof glass installed around the balcony. It’s real state-of-the-art stuff. If it’s good enough for the American President then I guess you will be well protected by it. You can barely tell it’s there, but let any old bullet try to get through it…’

  ‘And just how many thousands of dollars has that cost?’

  ‘Zillions,’ Jay responded cheerfully. ‘But it’s my treat—a welcome home present.’

  Luc was only inches from her now, his cool, grave gaze searching her face—no doubt looking for any weaknesses, Carrie decided.

  She had her little speech all prepared, but it still took an effort for her to clear her throat and begin unemotionally.

  ‘Thank you for what you did, Luc…for saving my life…’

  She tensed as she saw the flicker of anger darkening his eyes.

  ‘You’re my wife,’ he told her tersely. ‘And—’

  ‘The security guys are getting twitchy, Luc,’ Jay intervened. ‘Let’s get inside…’

  The minute they reached the private apartments Carrie stepped back, refusing to follow Luc into the salon.

  He frowned and turned to look questioningly at her. Amazingly, despite what he had been through, he looked as tough and strong as he had always done. In fact of the two of them she was the one who looked haggard and drawn, her body even thinner and her face paler, but of course she…

  Abruptly she forced herself to concentrate on what she had to do.

  ‘You and Jay have matters you need to discuss,’ she announced crisply. ‘Jay’s told me about the public speech you want to make.’ She swallowed.

  At first when Jay had told her about Luc’s public address she had cried out vehemently against it.

  ‘What if someone else decides to try and kill him?’ she had demanded emotionally. ‘What does he think he’s doing, taking that kind of risk?’

  ‘That bullet wasn’t intended for him, Carrie,’ Jay had reminded her. ‘And it wasn’t intended to kill either. We know that the gunman simply wanted to make a point, to frighten you and draw attention to his cause. He hadn’t allowed for the fact that Luc would see him and react in the way he did.’

  ‘Maybe he didn’t intend to kill, but that doesn’t mean that someone even more dangerous might not try to,’ Carrie had protested.

  ‘Luc is insistent,’ had been Jay’s response. ‘He says that—’

  ‘It’s his duty. Yes, I know,’ Carrie had supplied bitterly.

  ‘Carrie—’ Luc began now, but Carrie shook her head quickly, her lips a mutely stubborn line, before turning on her heel to leave.

  In her room everything was ready for her departure, and this time nothing was going to stop her.

  Tomorrow Luc would make his speech to his people, no doubt assuring them that there was no need for them to be concerned, that he was fit and well again and that nothing and no one would ever stop him from fulfilling his responsibilities towards them—certainly not a misguided young man. A young man to whom, Carrie already knew, Luc was going to show the greatest of compassion and generosity in pardoning him for what he had done.

  ‘Luc says that now all the disputed accounts have been closed there is no longer any reason for the genuine activists to continue with their protests. Interpol have already supplied him with the names of those they think might have infiltrated themselves into the group with an ulterior motive, and they are to be asked to leave the country or face up to the consequences of their actions which could well include incitement to regicide—theoretically still a treasonable offence here in S’Antander, and one that carries a life sentence of imprisonment,’ Jay had told Carrie

  Carrie was in her room, standing staring out of the window, when the door opened and Luc walked in. For a few seconds she was too shocked to speak. It was less than an hour since she had left him and she had assumed he would be tied up for many hours with matters of state.

  ‘You still intend to leave, then,’ he began without preamble.

  Carrie nodded her head.

  ‘Nothing has changed, Luc,’ she told him stiffly. ‘Everything I have already said to you still stands. Any relationship between us could only ever be sexual,’ she announced curtly. ‘You have no personal
feelings for me, nor I for you.’

  ‘Really? Yet Jay told me that when you first realised he had taken my place you thought he might have hurt me in some way.’

  Carrie looked away from him.

  ‘He told me that it was obvious how much you loved me!’

  I did,’ Carrie agreed woodenly, emphasising the past tense, but she could feel the raw pain of her unwanted emotions blocking her throat and anxiety began to take hold of her. She had to get away from Luc, and now…right now.

  ‘And as for your claim that I have no personal feelings for you! How dare you say that, Carrie?’ he demanded with soft anger. ‘Haven’t I shown you over and over again just how very, very powerful my love for you is? As a young man it was the hardest thing I ever did to let you go—’

  ‘To let me go?’ Carrie burst out. ‘You didn’t “let me go”, Luc. You dismissed me from your life, and in the cruellest way—instructing your godmother to do your dirty work for you. Did you not know how much she would enjoy it?’

  ‘What? I did no such thing! You were the one who chose to leave when my godmother approached you to warn you of the responsibility you would have to bear if our relationship continued and developed. You were the one who chose to walk away from it and from me. Of course I couldn’t blame you. You were very young, with your whole life ahead of you, and if I had married you then, at eighteen, you would have been forced to change your whole life. I knew I had no right to ask you to make that kind of sacrifice.’

  Carrie couldn’t speak. She felt dizzy with the shock of his unwitting revelations.

  ‘You…you blackmailed me into marrying you,’ she managed to point out, ‘and you didn’t do that because you love me, Luc. You did it for political reasons; you told me that yourself. You even—’

  ‘I am a man, and like all men I have my pride,’ Luc told her fiercely. ‘Of course I wasn’t going to admit to you that from the first moment I looked out of my window and saw you in the square I knew—’ He stopped. ‘You have accused me of using the loss of our child in the most base and cruel of ways to gain my own ends. Have you any idea how hurtful I found that accusation? How offensive and unbelievable? Do you know why I allowed Maria to withdraw money from her trust fund when I didn’t have to?’

  Carrie stared mutely at him.

  ‘I did it for you…because Harry is your brother and I wanted to do something that would please you. Had I chosen to I could have refused. If you don’t believe me ask Maria yourself…and of course you will not believe me…’

  The bitterness in his voice spiked Carrie’s existing pain with guilt. She could see that Luc was speaking the truth, and she could see too that she had misjudged him. But he was still who he was. No, not who he was, she corrected herself sadly. He was what he was.

  ‘These last weeks in hospital I’ve done a great deal of thinking, Carrie,’ he told her quietly, ‘and I’ve come to a decision. Tomorrow when I speak to my people I intend to announce my abdication!’

  Carrie stared at him in shocked disbelief.

  ‘I have done my best to fulfil my obligations to S’Antander, Carrie, and now I want ‘me’ time—my time!’ he told her fiercely. ‘Now I want what other men take as their right. The woman I love in my arms, my bed…my life! The children I want to give her! The privacy and security to enjoy my life with her and them.’

  ‘What are you trying to say? Luc, you can’t do that—I won’t let you!’ Carrie protested wildly.

  ‘You can’t stop me,’ Luc returned calmly. ‘Wherever you go, Carrie, I am going too. Wherever that is. I shall follow you until you let me into your life, until you admit me back into your heart, until you let me prove to you how much I do love you.’

  Carrie took a deep breath. He didn’t mean it. He was just using emotional blackmail on her—just bluffing!

  ‘Very well,’ she told him coolly. ‘If that is what you really want, Luc.’ She walked towards the window and looked out for a few seconds before turning round and telling him, ‘I’ve already booked my seat on a flight home tomorrow. I’m flying economy, of course…not private jet!’

  ‘I mean what I’m saying, Carrie,’ Luc told her steadily. ‘Tomorrow morning I shall tell my people what I plan to do. I’ve already informed Jay, and I intend to inform my council this evening.’

  Now he had really shocked her, but she refused to let him see it.

  ‘You can’t let Luc do this, Carrie.’

  ‘Why not?’ Carrie demanded as she faced Jay’s accusing look across the width of her private sitting room.

  Jay had walked in unannounced several minutes earlier, his face set and tense.

  ‘You know why not,’ he retorted grimly. ‘S’Antander needs Luc, and if you let him walk away from this country it won’t just be the country he’s destroying—it will be a part of himself as well, and you know it. Think about it. Do you want to live with half the man all of the time, or have half of his time and all of the man?’

  ‘That is moral blackmail, Jay,’ Carrie pointed out sharply. ‘And for your information I do not want Luc at all.’

  ‘Liar!’ Jay challenged her. ‘You love him just as much as he does you. What is it with you?’

  Carrie wouldn’t make any response. Why should she? she asked herself stubbornly.

  But later, when she was on her own, she couldn’t stop thinking about what both Jay and Luc himself had said to her.

  Luc did love her. And he loved her enough to give up his country for her!

  ‘I’ve booked myself a seat to Heathrow on the day after tomorrow’s flight. Once I get there…’

  Carrie put down her cutlery and looked at Luc down the length of the formal dinner table.

  ‘You might as well cancel it, Luc,’ she told him levelly.

  She could see the pain lance across his eyes before he hid it.

  ‘Carrie, all I want is a chance to prove myself to you…myself and my love!’

  The sensation, the emotion she had felt earlier when she had listened first to him and then to Jay returned, and this time she didn’t try to fight against it. Some things were just meant to be, she acknowledged. Some things could not be avoided or denied. Some things, no matter how painful, simply had to happen. And for her this…Luc…was one of them. And not just one of them, but the most important of all, she admitted, as the icy remoteness encasing her heart melted in a sudden rush of warmth and love flowed back into it.

  Luc loved her—she knew that now, just as surely as she knew that she loved him!

  Lifting her chin, she told him firmly, ‘I don’t want you to abdicate, Luc.’

  She could see him struggle to contain his anguish.

  ‘There isn’t really any point,’ she added gently.

  ‘There is every point,’ Luc protested savagely. ‘I want to be with you, Carrie—and more than that I need to be with you!’

  Gravely Carrie looked at him. She could already feel the pressure, the burden of the weight of the choice she was being offered. How many times must Luc have felt that pressure, that burden, and how many times must he have forced himself to put aside his own needs and turn instead to carry the responsibility of his inheritance?

  What was the measure…the test of true love, anyway? Demanding and getting a sacrifice? Or making the gift of one?

  Just for a moment she allowed herself to gaze inwardly on her most private and precious dreams, and then very carefully she put them away and started to speak, as lightly as she could.

  ‘As a little girl I always dreamed about being a princess, Luc, and I am not about to give up the chance to be one now just because you feel like being noble and making the ultimate sacrifice.’

  Surprise, despair and just the merest beginnings of unsteady hope were all evident in Luc’s eyes as he stared silently at her.

  ‘Besides,’ Carrie continued, ‘what would our son say if he discovered I’d deprived him of the chance to play at soldiers and wear a uniform, never mind bedazzle any amount of pretty girls with his title?�
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  ‘Our son!’

  Carrie heard the crash of the chair falling over as Luc stood up and pushed it out of the way in his hurry to get to her.

  ‘Our son?’ he repeated.

  ‘Well, maybe not our son. Maybe our daughter,’ Carrie allowed, but the disjointed words were muffled against his chest and then smothered by his lips as he started to kiss her in a way that told her it would be a long, long time before she was going to be allowed to so much as breathe properly again, never mind speak!

  EPILOGUE

  ‘OH, GOODNESS, Carrie. He’s so sweet—and just like Luc.’

  Carrie laughed as Maria cooed enthusiastically over Carrie’s six-week-old son, whose christening had been very much a public as well as a private affair.

  His birth had been celebrated in S’Antander with enthusiastic delight. Carrie had become a much valued and loved public figure since her marriage, involving herself in several personal projects and charities, and Luc had encouraged her to do so.

  ‘I never thought when Harry and I got married that you would be a mother before me—and especially not mother to Luc’s son.’ Maria grinned.

  Maria’s own baby was due at the end of the month, and Harry was hovering protectively at her side, anxious to get her safely back to England and the farm they had purchased, just in case all the excitement precipitated the birth.

  Automatically Carrie glanced across the large state drawing room, looking for Luc. And, as though they were invisibly linked together, he raised his head at exactly the same time and looked back at her, causing the Euro diplomat who had been talking to him to follow the direction of his glance.

  ‘Excuse me,’ Luc apologised to the statesman. ‘I must go and relieve my wife of her baby-carrying duties for a while.’

  Things had certainly changed since he was a young man, the statesman acknowledged, watching as Luc expertly scooped the sleeping baby out of his mother’s arms and put him on his own shoulder.

  ‘Luc. You’re shocking all the old brigade.’ Carrie laughed as she shook her head at him. ‘That is not what they expect to see a ‘‘Serene Highness’’ do.’