A Kind of Madness Read online

  ‘Mm. She was going to buy a small hatchback, but she saw this in the showroom and fell in love with it. She said you’d be horrified and probably give her a long lecture.’

  Suddenly another emotion was added to her confusion. This one was sharp and painful—desolation mingling with a sense of betrayal that her mother should discuss her with this… this stranger.

  Immediately another and potentially scorchingly humiliating thought struck her, and she asked huskily, ‘When you followed—er—saw me on the road, did you know who I was?’

  She was praying that he wouldn’t answer in the affirmative, and when she saw him nod his head she felt quite sick.

  ‘Oh, yes. I recognised you immediately. You haven’t really changed. Of course I was expecting you. Stupid of me, I suppose, but I’d expected you to recognise me too and when you didn’t…’

  He rubbed his hand along his jawline, and suddenly, and far too late, she did.

  ‘You’re Carter!’

  Impossible not to keep either the shock or the chagrin out of her voice, and she realised as he looked down at her that the smile had gone out of his eyes.

  ‘Yes,’ he agreed curtly, ‘and now that we’ve established that fact, perhaps we can go inside. I’ve had a long and tiring day, not made any better by a half-hysterical woman accusing me virtually of attempting to abduct her, not to mention my crimes against the wife and family I do not happen to have.’

  As Elspeth stared towards the house, its silence suddenly made her suspicious. ‘Where are my parents?’ she demanded, frowning at him.

  ‘That’s what I wanted to tell you. They decided to leave a few days earlier and spend some time with some old friends en route for Southampton. They left this morning—said to give you their love and to tell you you aren’t to worry about a thing. I promised them I’d be on hand when you arrived to explain everything. That’s why I was hoping to stop you earlier—I was on my way to drive over to Knutsford with some provisions for a restaurant we supply there, but in the circumstances…’

  Several things struck Elspeth at once. The first and most immediate was that she had made an utter and complete fool of herself and that, far from following her for the kind of nefarious and sexual purpose she had assumed, Carter was patently oblivious to her as a woman; the second was that betraying and very worrying ‘we’. Had her foolish, too trusting parents already been tricked out of what was rightfully theirs?

  Wishing desperately that they had waited until she arrived, she ignored Carter, turning her back on him and heading for the kitchen door.

  To discover that it was not unlocked surprised her, and, while she was still staring at it in baffled fury, Carter stepped in front of her and inserted a key into the lock, deftly turning it and opening the door for her.

  ‘A small precaution I’ve persuaded your parents to take. They’re far too trusting.’

  ‘Yes, they are, aren’t they?’ Elspeth agreed through gritted teeth. Why was it that this man was making her feel an outsider, an interloper, a stranger almost in her own home, frustrating and obstructing her at every turn she took?

  Suddenly her head started to ache. She felt dirty and tired, and she longed almost ridiculously to see her mother come bustling towards her, soothing her with the promise of a cup of tea and some of her home-made bread. Silly tears of anger and weakness clouded her eyes.

  Fiercely she dashed them away. Heavens, she hadn’t cried since…since that episode in the bank’s staff-room, and she certainly wasn’t going to do so now, in front of this horrible, horrible man.

  Abruptly moving past him, she headed for the door and the stairs, pausing only when she had opened it to say frostily to him, ‘Well, it was thoughtful of you to be here to welcome me and tell me that my parents have left, Carter, but now if you’ll excuse me I’m tired and rather grubby. I think I’ll go straight upstairs and get ready for bed.’

  Not waiting to see how he had taken her dismissal, she went upstairs. All she wanted was for him to take himself off to wherever it was he was living. Tomorrow would be soon enough to try to come to terms with the enormity of her own idiocy. All right, so she had made a mistake—a natural one surely in the circumstances. He was lucky she hadn’t reported him to the police, hounding her like that. She bit her lip, wishing she wasn’t able to imagine the scene at the police station had she done so. Carter she was sure would have relished revealing his identity, making her look a complete fool.

  Of course he must have known she wouldn’t recognise him. Why, it was over ten yeras since she had last seen him. Then he had had that thick, bushy beard and that wild, unkempt hair which had made him look unapproachable and rather dangerous.

  He was still dangerous, to her parents anyway—but he was soon going to discover that she was a very different proposition, that she could see exactly what he was up to. Thank goodness Peter had had the wisdom to point out to her just what his motives might be.

  Mingled with her exhaustion and her anger was another emotion, a sharp, dangerous emotion that hurt and ached, an emotion that made some secret place deep inside her heart feel sore and tender, and all because she had seen the amusement in his eyes when he’d informed her just why he had been following her, and she had known how much pleasure it had given him to refute her accusations. If he had said the words out aloud he couldn’t have made it plainer just how little possibility there was of his finding her attractive or desirable.

  Quite why that should hurt she had no idea—nor did she want to know.

  She pushed open the door to the spare room. The house had four bedrooms, but as yet her parents had only got round to furnishing two of them. As it opened and she switched on the light, she stared at the room in confusion.

  A man’s jacket hung on the back of the desk chair, a pair of trainers on the floor beside it. There were papers scattered on the desk, and other articles of clothing on the bed…male clothing.

  ‘I’m sorry, I should have warned you,’ Carter’s voice came from behind her. ‘Your parents asked me to move in while they’re away to keep an eye on things. Your mother said that you’d probably prefer to use their room, since it has its own bathroom.’

  ‘You’re staying here?’ She couldn’t believe it. It was all some horrid joke.

  ‘That’s right.’

  ‘But there’s no need. I’m here—I mean, that’s why I’m here, so that I can take charge—care of things.’

  ‘Your mother seemed to think you needed a holiday. I think she was concerned that it might be too much for you, and, since your folks have been good enough to offer me their spare room, until I find somewhere of my own, offering to take charge—care of things for them while they’re away seemed the least I could do.’

  She couldn’t believe it. She wouldn’t believe it.

  Ignoring the man standing almost immediately behind her, Elspeth turned on her heel and with as much dignity as she could muster walked blindly into her parents’ bedroom.

  How could they have done this to her—and without saying a word? They must have known how she would feel.

  She shuddered, trying to take a deep, steadying gulp of air. It would have been bad enough if she had simply arrived to find Carter already here, but to have discovered that he was a man she’d thought was pursuing her for a completely different kind of motive than he actually had been, was so deeply humiliating for her that even now the knowledge of her own folly was scorching her skin a dark and very hot red.

  And Carter had enjoyed her embarrassment, just as he had enjoyed telling her that her parents obviously did not trust her enough to leave her in sole charge. Oh, he might pretend it was out of concern for her, but she knew better…and so did he. She discovered that she was grinding her teeth again, a wild and bitter fury overtaking her.

  Well, he might be laughing now, but he would soon discover that she had his measure.

  First thing in the morning, once she had had a good night’s sleep and felt more like herself, she was going to make sure
that he left. The simple reminder that she was virtually an engaged woman and he a single man should surely be enough to make him aware of the impropriety of their both sleeping under the same roof, even if her foolish, unrealistic parents had not done so.

  And then, once she had got him out of the house, she would make sure that whenever he came to the smallholding she watched everything he did. He might think it was going to be easy, cheating her parents, but she was going to show him otherwise.

  On this satisfactory thought a huge yawn overtook her, reminding her that she was very, very tired, and that tomorrow she was going to need all her energy and guile.

  She gave a faint sigh and smothered another yawn. She was tired. And then she remembered that her case was still in the car. The thought of coming face to face with Carter now, when she was still feeling so shocked and disorientated, made her stop halfway to the bedroom door.

  For tonight she would borrow one of her mother’s nightdresses; she knew her mother wouldn’t mind, and after all it was the least she could do, having been a co-author to her present predicament. How could her parents have done this to her? They must have known—and to have left without telling her, without waiting to see her… The suspicion suddenly crossed her mind that they might have deliberately left ahead of her arrival in order to avoid her angry reaction to Carter’s presence.

  For some reason that brought a resurgence of that odd pain in her chest. Angry with herself for being so silly, she pulled open one of the drawers in the old-fashioned chest her mother had inherited from her own parents, and removed the nightdress she found at the top of the pile.

  She and her mother were a similar height and shape, although her mother was a couple of sizes larger than Elspeth. In fact, her parents always remarked when they saw her that they thought she was too thin, and Elspeth had given up trying to explain to them that, in the high-pressure world of business, a slightly lean and hungry look added an extra sharpness to one’s image. And besides, without the constant temptation of her mother’s wonderful cooking, it was all too easy to fall into the habit of eating light, nutritious meals. Without someone to share a meal with, there was no temptation to linger at the table; sometimes she found herself remembering wistfully the meals of her childhood, especially breakfast, when her father would come from his early morning farm chores and the three of them would sit down together.

  Her parents had never been the kind of couple with nothing to say to one another; despite their rural life they had a keen interest in everything going on in the world about them, and when she herself had received her offer of promotion with the bank they had been the first to encourage her to take it up, even though it had meant her moving away from home.

  She had missed them desperately at first, and sometimes she was ashamed to admit that even now she woke up in the morning, confused by the direction of the light coming into her room, wondering why she wasn’t in her familiar bedroom at the farm.

  She prepared for bed in the pretty, but thoroughly practical bathroom which her mother had had designed by local craftsmen, admiring the solid-lined oak cupboards, and the skilful way in which every inch of space had been utilised.

  Outside the window the security lights suddenly went on, and as she tensed she heard Carter calling to her father’s dogs.

  His voice floated up to her through the half-opened window. ‘Come on, girls, let’s go and check the greenhouses.’

  She found she was still holding her breath as she 6listened to his footsteps dying away across the yard.

  Why had this had to happen to her? Why had fate seen it necessary to lure her into making such an idiot of herself? Why in fact had fate seen fit to thrust Carter back into their lives, to be the source of so much anxiety and irritation?

  Sighing, she climbed into her parents’ old-fashioned high bed, with its feather bolster and pillows, welcoming the coolness of her mother’s linen sheets with their faint scent of lavender.

  Tomorrow she would deal with the problem of Carter. Tomorrow.

  CHAPTER THREE

  DISTASTEFULLY Elspeth studied the clothes she had discarded the previous evening, reflecting that when she had decided against braving Carter in order to get her case, she had not looked far enough forward.

  She had heard him calling to the dogs ten minutes or so ago. In fact, shamefully it had been that sound which had wakened her. Normally an early riser, she had been shocked to discover it had been well gone seven.

  But now, with Carter out of the way, it might be a strategic time to nip downstairs and retrieve her case. Then she could get dressed and confront him with her ultimatum that he must find himself some accommodation elsewhere. She was quite sure that once she had pointed out to him the impropriety of their both sharing the same roof in her parents’ absence, he would have no alternative but to agree with her.

  The early morning sun had warmed the flagstones of the yard, and Elspeth’s toes curled in sensuous appreciation of that warmth as she darted from the kitchen door to her car, quickly tugging on the driver’s handle, only to discover that it wouldn’t open. The wretched thing was locked, she realised frustratedly. But by whom? She knew she had not locked it—on the contrary. She gnawed worriedly at her bottom lip, knowing how Peter would have reacted to that piece of folly. He was extremely security-conscious, so much so that sometimes she almost found it irritating.

  She was just mulling over this recognition when she heard the excited yelps of the dogs. Turning round, she fended off their affectionate welcome, bending down to pet them both.

  Peter did not approve of pets, especially not dogs…especially hairy, over-enthusiastic and slightly undisciplined dogs. Perhaps once they had children she might be able to persuade him to change his mind. She would hate her children to grow up without knowing the pleasure of having a pet.

  She was just about to stand up when she realised that the dogs hadn’t come into the yard alone. Her breath hissed out of her lungs as she saw Carter standing in front of her, looking down at her with an expression she couldn’t interpret.

  This morning he was dressed in worn jeans, tucked into wellingtons, and a faded denim shirt that seemed to have shrunk as well as faded from the way the buttons strained across his chest.

  Suddenly, for no reason at all, she was acutely self-conscious of the fact that her eyes were just about on the same level as his hips and that his jeans, while not exactly skin-tight, were certainly old and soft enough to make her aware that he was a man in a way that she was never aware of Peter’s body.

  Angry with herself for her almost too predictable feminine reaction to the sight of such a totally male and physically strong body, she attempted to stand up, forgetting that one of the dogs was standing on the hem of her borrowed nightdress.

  As a result the neckline of the nightdress, while possibly perfectly demure on someone of her mother’s proportions, dipped alarmingly under the pressure she was exerting on it, revealing, as she realised when she looked down to see why she couldn’t move, a good deal more of her body than she had anticipated.

  It wasn’t her fault that, while her legs, hips and waist were enviably slender, her breasts were unexpectedly, and to her, embarrassingly voluptuous. So much so that she normally deliberately chose blouses and sweaters large enough to merely hint discreetly at their curves; her office suits had neatly tailored, pencil-slim skirts, but she always teamed them with longline, generously cut jackets. This nightdress though was not designed for such a function, and as she stood there, trapped by Bess’s paws and her own stupidity, trembling with chagrin, she felt the slow burn of hot colour seeping up over her skin.

  To make matters even worse, as she bent down to free her hem, one frilly shoulder of the recalcitrant and devious garment slipped down her arm, so that she looked for all the world like some seventeenth-century milkmaid, flaunting her body for the delectation of her master. A small shudder of horror gripped her; that she who was always so modest, so coolly protective where her sexuality was conc
erned, that she should be put in this kind of position… All she had wanted to do was to retrieve her suitcase.

  She finally managed to eject Bess from her feet, and, while the dog gave her a pathetic, ingratiating look, she managed to stand up, clutching what was left of her dignity—along with the nightdress—firmly around her to demand bitterly, ‘Did you lock my car?’

  ‘Yes. I should have thought you’d have done it yourself,’ came the reproving reply. ‘After all, you live in London. You must be aware of the incidence of car thefts. Just because we don’t live in a city, it doesn’t mean we’re safe from crime here.’

  Elspeth stared at him. At another time she would have been very quick indeed to reject his allegations, but right now she had more important things on her mind. Like her clothes.

  ‘Well, if you wouldn’t mind giving me my keys,’ she began acidly, but he ignored her, frowning slightly as he came towards her.

  For a moment she actually thought he was going to touch her, and she shrank back against the car. She could smell the clean soap scent of his skin, her awareness of that scent an intimacy that made her mind recoil in shock at her body’s weakness.

  ‘I shouldn’t stay out here too long,’ he told her warningly. ‘The sun can be surprisingly strong; you’re very fair-skinned and, by the look of you, you’re not used to exposure to strong sunlight.’

  Briefly Elspeth was lost for words. What did he think she was? A child? She opened her mouth and told him freezingly, ‘Thank you for your advice, but it really isn’t necessary. For one thing, it isn’t yet eight o’clock in the morning and the sun’s hardly strong enough to burn me at this hour, and for another, when I came out here it was simply to retrieve my case from my car. If it weren’t for the fact that you had seen fit to lock the car and remove my keys, I shouldn’t be standing out here now. So if you would kindly tell me where they are…’

  She was conscious when she had finished speaking that her voice had risen several notes above its normal, even, calmly pitched tone, and that she was almost shaking with anger, while he—hateful, odious man—was simply standing staring at her with the sort of frown that made it plain that he thought she was over-reacting.